Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(617): View more from Massachusetts

Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name

Fav 10 1161 823
share tweet
(312): View more from Illinois

Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.

Fav 29 1433 5383
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(603): View more from New Hampshire

i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A

Fav 28 1457 5654
share tweet
(336): View more from North Carolina

This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.

Fav 36 6537 1526
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(650): View more from California

she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.

Fav 17 1734 9374
share tweet
(917): View more from New York City

Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.

(347): View more from New York

I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.

Fav 14 1544 5245
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(775): View more from Nevada

Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?

Fav 13 4520 1870
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(440): View more from Ohio

I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.

Fav 4 934 456
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(410): View more from Maryland

I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.

Fav 0 11 21
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT