we have officially lost it.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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