My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize