Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize