like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize