That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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