Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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