THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
