3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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