Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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