trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
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His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
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We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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