My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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