are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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