There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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