Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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