Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
