And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
We are all done wearing pants today
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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