Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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