Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
