Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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