I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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