The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.