Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
