I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Randomize
