Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
people are starting to question the shark bite story
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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