He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
