he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
