i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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