I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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