Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
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No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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