oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
