Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
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