hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
