I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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