i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
