white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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