She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Randomize
