Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
