i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
There r osticjed everywhere
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
