She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
