Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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