Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
