So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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