Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
