I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone stole a lamp last night.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
my liver is dry heaving
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize