We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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