i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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