Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
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