the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
