I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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